totally late wishes

It was only when I was walking back from office with my roommate I realised it was "Karva Chauth" that day. I started thinking about the numerous, faithful women starving across the country and waiting for the moon to emerge out of the cloudy sky.

As we reached the narrow lane to our building, it was already dark and we looked up too see the moon. And then my friend held my hand tight with excitement and pointed to the balcony of a nearby apartment "there is a women performing the channi (karva chauth ritual). isn't it lovely? I have never seen this before except in hindi serials..."
blah blah went her conversation with excitement and curiosity.

But it was only when we came closer to the apartment I realised that the lady was NOT performing "channi" but putting undergarments on the rope for drying. her husband was helping her.

I looked at my friend with the straightest face possible and we walked the rest of our way in silence.




And so here I am wishing that very same friend and my lovely sister a "happy first wedding anniversary " (though its very late)

May you both have a life filled with love, happiness, suprises, cooking, financial confusions,shopping,travel and annoying babies.

Memories.

"Unfaithful" he said as I leaned to rest on his chest reading my book.

"what about it?"

"I think we are the only people comfortable with it" he said lighting his second cigarette and trying to hold his book.

"Thats what you choose to believe" I said without a deep breath, sigh or emotions.

He continued reading and I watched the busy street from the window of the crowded coffee shop.


That is what he wanted to believe and like always I choose to remain quiet and enjoy the moments.

wake up call. tagged!

So the cheerful, energetic lady I met in one of the two hostels I stayed in Bangalore decided to wake me up from the laziness and confusion of what to write next. of course I did try to update my blog many at times but the troubled, confused phase of my life brought out only depressing post which I later choose not to publish. So now Im tagged by Preeti and getting back to blogging.

Last movie seen in a theater:
Dasavatharam.
The most disappointing movie I watched this year.

What book are you reading?
Love in the time of cholera.
But I'm tempted to drop it and grab "One hundred years of solitude" for a second reading.

Favorite board game:
Life.
I'm yet to become a millionaire :(

Favorite magazine:
Reader's Digest.
But its being years since I read one.

Favorite smells:
Maagi (masala),chilly powder, sandalwood,ginger


Favorite sounds:
violent beach at night,forest after rain, mustard seeds cracking in hot oil,bamboo chimes,brass bells.

Worst feeling in the world:
loneliness and betrayal

What is the first thing you think of when you wake up?
If I have time for some more sleep.

Favorite fast food place:
Stars and Stripes, Brigade Road

Future child’s name:
never thought about it

Finish this statement, “If I had a lot of money I’d…”
go for a world tour else go shopping ;)

Do you drive fast?
I cant drive :( hmph!

Do you sleep with a stuffed animal?
No :O

Storms - Cool or Scary?
Cool ( if im not in a desert)

Do you eat the stems on broccoli?
Yes

If you could dye your hair any color, what would be your choice?
bright red streaks

Name all the different cities/towns you have lived in:
Kochin, Bangalore

Favorite sports to watch:
Football, Basketball

One nice thing about the person who sent this to you:
sweet and lively

What’s under your bed?
nothing at all but yeah maybe a few strands of my hair :p

Would you like to be born as yourself again?
Yes

Morning person or night owl?
Night Owl

Over easy or sunny side up?
Over easy

Favorite place to relax:
home, Pebbles and TGIF

Favorite pie:
Don't like pie :(

Favorite ice cream flavor:
Chocolate and Vanilla.Could never accept anything else as Ice Cream. :p

You pass this tag to:
Toothless, Deepak and Deepa

Of all the people you tagged this to, who’s most likely to respond first?
Deepak *fingers crossed*

home-going

I don't want another month like the previous one. The short month of February was filled with lots of work, confusion, home-going, house hunting, mood-swings and weight-gain.Everything ended well with one of those many trips to my hometown, Kerala. I'm sure things cant get worse than that .This last home- going was on the month end to celebrate my dad's 60th birthday and emotionally support him during his retirement.

Kanyakumari Express
10:55 P.M
I was on my way to the wash room.
One "yo-man-yo" nerd (N): So you don't have a confirmed seat eh?
Me: Huh?
N: I saw you walking up and down
Me: My sister is there in S5 and I’m in S3... (Oh god...why am i even answering?)
N: Can you share your seat for sometime?
Me(nail biting ) :Err....( he reduced me to a shocked, weak, scared girl)
N: I don't have a confirmed seat so can I sit with you for sometime?
Me: Mine is a middle birth. So I don't think you can sit up there. (I can’t believe I said that)
N: That is ok *evil grin*
Me (worried): You can use it now. I'm going to my sister to have dinner
N: Nah. I will come later in the night.....
Don’t ask me what happened next once I recovered from my fear n shock of his behavior.
N:Stop hitting me and what did you pour into my eyes?
Me(to myself): Shit! (I missed kicking his balls)

Home
11:55 a.m
Kicking the main door open
Me: I’m home!
Dropping my bags down in filmy style
Me: I’m hooommmeeee!!!!
Clearing my throat
Me: I’mmmmmm hooommeeeeeeeee......
Mom (coming slowly from kitchen) : So?
This is what happens when you go home too often. hmph!

Tea time
5:00 p.m
Dad: What’s on your ears?
Me (jumping out of my seat): whaatt???
Dad: what earring is that?
Me: God. You scared me!
Dad (inspecting carefully): yuck...it’s a dirty tiny skull.
Me : Oopss
Dad: Junk is all you eat and wear. Take off those black metal earrings, nose ring...the ring... (Searching for more)
Me: no way
Mom (giggling): ha ha ha ha. You are wearing just one anklet! Since how long are u walking around like this?Do you even know when you lost the other one?
Me: Grrrr....this is fashion, style!!!
Dad: (pointing to my feet): this one???? ha ha ha ha
I choose selective deafness

nothing-to-do time
8 p.m
Me: how many people are coming home tomorrow?
Mom: oh god. That reminds me
Dad (running): yeah...im getting them
Me (confused)
Dad: get all those metals off your body and wear these
Mom: no arguments on this
Me: metals. metals..what are you people talking about?
Mom: i just want you to wear some other metal. a little shiny, expensive , bright ones
Me: gold??? *faints*

Dinner time
9 p.m
Me: dad... is it ok to wear some dull color tomorrow for the party?
Dad (busy eating) : yes molu. Anything you are comfortable in.
Me(suprised): Wowwww
Dad (with a serious face and stern voice): NO! Only Salwar!
Me: Kurta?
Dad (eyes widening) : you mean the Salwar without dupataa?
Me(straight face): OK...I am wearing Salwar.
Dad: and take off that nose ring, it looks like some fishing hook
Me (head down) : Ok
Dad: and the black nail polish too
Me(screaming): Why am I even here????

Today I received the photos of that day. It brought smile to my tired face. Damn..I look pretty after all the forced modifications. Trust me, parents know what is best! (though im now without the modifications)

Dad- I seriously hope you stopped reading my blog ! But if you are still around, I’m sorry I forgot to buy/do something on your birthday. I know 60th birthday is something important and special. I should have added something to your day. But I didn’t even realize or think about it .That day I sat there looking at you with your friends- are you really 60? You confuse me with your charm, energy and character.

now playing: Tum Se Hi (Jab We Met)

among my give-away-treasures

He was my neighbor.
6 months back

I met him first as i rushed into the already closing escalator. seeing his scared face i gave him a healing smile. that was the first time i saw him that close. neatly ironed dress, formal wear, shining shoes, clean shaved, chest out, head high. i looked at myself. cotton pants, short kurta, flat sandals, long cloth bag and wet hair. he looked at me and started keenly observing me. he was fascinated i knew. esp with the things in my hand.some papers, a colorful stole and the earing i could not wear in the hurry. he stood there watching me wrap the stole around my neck, pushing the papers carelessly into my bag and wearing the earing . all throughout me returning his smile. as we reached the ground floor i just finished tying up my hair into a pony tail. he got out and started walking in a great speed. few steps and he turned back.

" that pony tail doesn't look good"

annoyed, i opened my hair. i slowed down waiting for him to reach his car and for my friend to start the bike.

strictly coincidence.we started seeing each other more often. fresh in the morning, exhausted in the evenings, bored in the mid-week, tired at the vegetable market and annoyed in the corridors with calls from office. we were in the same mood every time we met and we shared a million feelings without a word. we never spoke. we never wanted to.on a particular day as i walked to the veranda of the flat to dry my clothes i heard someone on the phone. it was him. when i finished hanging my clothes and turned, he was right behind me. i felt embassed- wet, dirty and tired after washing the clothes. he didn't seems to notice any of it.

" have you being to the terrace on 7th floor. it is nice at night. i go there every evening. you want to come? "

i stood there confused at what was happening.

" i will meet you near the escalator at 7" without waiting for an answer he started walking to his flat which was just next to mine.

7:00pm. i dressed carefully careless. as i opened the main door ,he was already there. we took the lift to 7th floor. moments like this always made me shy and quiet.since that day we met every evening in the terrace and shared a million thoughts and feelings. obvious enough the relationship took a turn. kissing my forehead and holding my hands he said he loved me and want me in his life. i walked away saying " i cant".

i had always being like this.incapable and scared to give myself one more chance

1 week back

I was pushing open the door to a optical shop

"Excuse me"
i turned shocked and fast to the familiar voice
" you?"
" are you in a hurry?"
" no but where were you? you vacated without telling a word. it is being 5 months!"

i walked close to him.i wanted to hug him tight but folding my hands i stood there trying not to steal his warmth and love.

"I was in Mumbai but now back to Bangalore"
Beating my tears and happiness i walked quietly with him to the coffee shop. how lonely and lost i felt in his absence.

" you look very different. five months and so much change? "

i looked up from the menu

"change like what?"

" you are wearing a new floaters and watch. and i notice you had a hair cut" he smiled

i laughed

" and your tired dark eyes "

" too busy for creams you see" i tried to laugh

he took my hands. " your hands are rough now ! you washing a lot of clothes and utensils i suppose"

trying to laugh i pulled away my hands from his.

coffee came cold with the bill.

" i notice you are quite today"

clearing my throat i got ready for a careful conversation " just tired after work"

" sure you look tired. esp with those lines under your eyes and the tired mood. but you are still so beautiful. is it the sparkle in you eyes or your scary laughter? or maybe i love the way your lips tremble and eyes fill when i talk like this"

i got up and left the place.

i wish he waits till i have the courage to give myself one more chance. to trust and stand up for my love.

now playing: toy soldiers (eminem)

Smiling all the way

Dynamic and hyperactive. She will pose lovely and you have only 2 or 3 seconds to click!

I felt ashamed of myself when i met her. How much do we all complain, crib and cry over silly (totally silly) things?

This was the first time i met her. Few days back she met with an accident. She had stitches on her knee because of the rod that pierced through and she couldn't walk because of other wounds on both her legs. But the house was filled with her laughter and everyone was busy playing the games she invented.

Amidst the fear, tears and horror of an accident and the pain, she was laughing and playing not just because she is a kid but because of her innocence and forgiveness. I wish you all the same this Christmas. It's time for joy , forgiveness, love and laughter. Apologise! Forgive! and smile all the way.

"Merry christmas to all of you "

mixed feelings

everytime i decide to get serious in my life (read pretend) by talking and laughing less , there will be something to cheer me up, get me into the mood that makes me put my leg up on the table and laugh else bang my head for the misfortune.
I'm having mixed feelings after reading this reply mail from my brother.

me wrote:
i got the mail. i will check and get back to you.how are you ?? how is everything at home??n do one thing , mail me in this id- xxxxxx@yahoo.com

love
munna

reply mail:
u got my mail ? wonder
you ll check and get back to me --For what ? no need..! (if u want u check it out, its for your own good)
I am just normal- all organs functions are normal except for excessive perspiration due to the regions high humidity level (this also include recent global climate variations analysed by hundreds of scientist around the world inclusive of excess melting of glaciers in the Himalayas,avalanche disruption in north Afghanistan this spring break,excess heat generated by pacific ocean surface and abrupt dislocation of Antarctic Ice bergs and early melting,recent quake and Tsunami warnings in south japan)
things at home are as it is before. things like TV remote,CD drive ,kitchen utensils,bathroom flush lever,letterbox ,door,gate,scooter,car,water hose and things related to chesko* are the things that change positions frequently,displaced or repositioned. hope you are "OK" with the things at home !
hope you are fine after reading this E-mail.please don't ask stupid questions like how r u,how is home,happy birthday, etc etc etc .All i want you to do is to register in fast web ,search 4 a scholarship and save yourself.and please tell me why do you use two question mark for A question.
thank you
xyz

chesko*- my pet dog smuggled from bangalore to kochin

now playing: walkaway(kelly clarkson)